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In , at the age of fifty

B quality the technical assistance expert of the UN year in Thailand worked.In , at the age of fifty five years, he received the second doctor's degree, this time on psychology, and since then works as the psychotherapist, specializing on problems of families and married couples.TO THE READER Passed four years from the moment of issue of the first edition of the book Roberta and Gene Bayardov in Russian.For these years a lot of things changed in our life.One problems passed in it into nothingness, others, new problems appeared.

And there

One of Hotelochek grew very quickly, after all her lyubikmy boy Igor, unlike other children, very often her fed and in large quantities once a day sent it on a vozkdukha the volitions.Of course, the eaten volitions quickly zakbyvatsya by Igor, but it proceeded not for long.In one of days it met the Hotelkaya.And there was it in toy store where Igor saw very expensive car treasurehunter.That in it was only not: it shone with headlights, the drill could drill the earth and even it had a laser beam that, for fun prozhikgy earth, to make the way to treasures.

It always

Possibly, you will be able, eliminating from the speech these provocative incentives to reduce number of the obzyvaniye cases disturbing you and abuse.Wonder: If I wanted that the child swore or called me, what I should have done?Your answer to this question can to prompt as actually you achieve all this.Gloomy or hostile installation in communication.At Bernice gloomy installation.It always looks gloomy and confoundedly.At Timothy hostile installation.

I noticed

Today called from school and told that you were not there ten days.I noticed that you go without a helmet by the motorcycle of the friend.I was told from police that you were detained in a public place for that, that you were drunk.Tell the child that you feel concerning this situation, having used thus the Yastatement.I am concerned, hearing it.I am afflicted with it.I worry when I hear it.I am surprised.Point to those consequences which you see.

It found

Mother too learned much.It found in music an incomparable means of communication with the son, but not only.This experience its feat on deeper studying of music which became later for it a power source and inspiration in hard life.It is better to measure this tiny musical progress of the child with autism not by results, and, whether music of the child mentions, whether he has satisfaction or not.For the child's mother with autism great day when at PTA meeting she it is proud came declared that John can play the piano and read notes.

You, probably, kept

Therefore many children in a stressful situation suck a finger, and adults cigarettes, but it is already perverted instinct.You, probably, kept the very best darlings ig rushka and games of the child.Store, not emissions howl them.When the person is intense, he should distract.To switch.To be engaged in something simple and simple.There is no way better, than to return it emotionally when the whole world rotated round it.And on the first call to me it is bad, help, console me!

So constrain

Can happen and so, that you and your child will pass through even big collisions, will reach to limit; and only then the situation will start improving.So constrain yourself also be ready to pass through everything.Proceed from the following parcel, everything that you do according to our recommendations, actually helps, positive results will collect and will lead you to the happy final out of dependences on, whether you see or not intermediate positive changes.That it can occur, we know from many desperate parents with whom we happened to work.

Since fourfive

The more you communicate with the child, the more actively he seeks for communication with you.Each your conversation with the kid is a stimulation of acoustical attention, acoustical and speech memory, activization of voice reactions.Since fourfive months the child starts murmuring.Prepare to that the kid will murmur months to seven.Farewell, chains of vowels!Hello, first harbingers of consonants!The mouth increases in volume, so language can move more actively, and the child can say concordants.

It simple

But we should not confuse this natural social solidarity with the organization of society of adults, which pra Vit human destinies.It simple last stage unless Tia of children, almost divine and incomprehensible creation emb riona of society.Soon after achievement of sixyear age, when re the benok enters a new stage of development noting thereby transition from society in a germinal stage to society, only that been born, spontaneously there is other form is real stvovaniya in which groups will be organized consciously.

It is convenient

The same rules can be executed differently in the form of the pictogram it is possible nearby and to write the text just in case.It is convenient because then everyone will appear on a single sheet and you will be able to hang out them in turn or all at once, but in the center on what want to concentrate attention of the child especially.It is possible to make rules in the form of schemes or to imitate road signs and to create something similar, on subject necessary to you.Do not forget to come back to the passable material from time to time to be convinced: the child precisely remembered it.

This game

By means of acoustical memory it finds a suitable box on other table and orders them.This game can also be held as game of partners with each other; boxes of one series distribute to six children.The teacher shakes any box from other series.Child, which holds a box with the same noise, brings it to the teacher; all boxes are distributed.Each child listens to noise of the box.He tries to find the child, at which the box rustles in the same way; the teacher chooses from any series a box with the most silent, loudest and intermediate noise.

Thus the teenager

Making similar offenses, he or she breaks and at worst something can make the rights of other people that will put to them direct loss.Thus the teenager gets also some idea about the law which, perhaps, at first are reduced to that it is easy for them to neglect, and then if to it has the luck and he will not manage to become inveterate the offender already starts understanding that not so easily to bypass laws and violations them can have very unpleasant consequences.You cannot directly to affect the child so that he ceased to be engaged things of this sort; therefore it is necessary only to hope that police will interfere before business goes too far.

Mother picked

Mother ran to them, and the daughter jumped off from a horse and too ran to the mother.Mother picked up the girl on hands, began to embrace her and to kiss.And itself for some reason plakcht.And the daughter cries.When they calmed down, called the forester to the house.And he told mother as met Yanochka.In the evening mother put to bed at first a small sekstrichka, and then and to Yanochk.Also told the daughter: You from myself I will not release more nikogkd!

The child

.On the contrary, all sch thaw that he was lucky.Efforts, which parents of a predprina wash for the sake of children, bring them joy, it is part roditelsko go missions.The child awakens in parents that adults call ideals selfsacrifice ideals, unselfishness advantages which it is almost impossible about rest out of family life.What businessman, having opportunity to acquire property necessary for it, will tell the competitor: Take, let it will be yours?But if hungry parents do not have enough food, they is rather from seem from the last piece of bread, than will leave the child the hungry.

Settled

And only then they learn it can be divided into bigger quantity of segments.At first nomadic somewhere from April to November.The second settled from November to March.Nomadic time is when the space round you is important.Settled when the space in you is important.We even have a transition holiday since nomadic time on settled and back.Taking into account these temporary features, it is much easier to judge children's geographical discoveries which accompany them.

He suggests

The child sorts them by color and a form.The teacher puts the yellow triangle on the middle of a carpet.He suggests to apply three red triangles to this triangle.So the hexagon turns out.Then the teacher cleans a yellow triangle.The child fills a vacant place other red triangles.Then the teacher suggests the child to put with each other gray triangles.The child compares two hexagons.At last, the child puts with each other green triangles on black lines so that turned out a trapeze.

If child

To the child who wants to go itself, it has to be given a cart mozhnost to try to make it most, because names but practice strengthens any developing ability, and practice is all the same necessary and after acquisition by the main skill.If child up to threeyear age of Bet time is carried on handles and I quite often had enough such to see, it does not promote, and stirs it to development.As only independence is reached, continuing to help the adult becomes a hindrance.Therefore it is clear that we should not carry the child on handles, and have to allow to it to go and if the hand wants it ra boats, we have to give it those things on which it will be able to exercise reasonable activity.

All this

Now or make work for the child, or take measures, that somehow differently to provide its performance.All this can quite be done joyfully and vigorously, because you completely finished the second step and already that most achieved success regardless of how your child reacted and whether he made the work or not.Congratulate yourself as you defended the rights.Be glad to any feelings of selfconfidence and, perhaps even to fun which you could test when upholding the rights.Third step The third step is reduced, as a matter of fact, to repetition of the second step, when in the next time you face the same problem.

It reacted

It as if jumped up or jumped instead of simply going.It reacted to sounds doubly: or was silent and it was completely dissolved, having lost in the resonance caused by long harmonious sounds, or if heard a loud, exciting sound or music at fast speed became obsessed, doing the sharp, fast movements which are not giving in to control shook hands and feet, furiously gnashed teeth.Her loneliness, violent protest against any attempts to get into her world who demanded a response from her party, and thirst for monotony were the main symptoms of autism of Pamela.

The most

However regardless from, whether there is at you an opportunity to change a harmful external event or no, care of your internal voice as we insistently advised you in to this chapter, it is absolutely necessary.The most important, the most essential that you can make for yourself and the child, consists in taking own life in hand, to make it such what you want, and to do with it that you actually want.Oblige themselves to be true and careful in relation to the to inner self.

And you with

You know how it happens when you are afflicted or upset with something.yes Annie answered.She knew that when with something was upset, sometimes really did nonsenses.And you with mother will sometime live again together?asked Enni.No the father told.We forever will remain your parents, but we will never not live together any more and never we will get married again.Now Annie knew it.First, how they left, she long hoped that parents again will meet.

Apparently, she felt

the Girl embraced me, laughing heartily, as the ordinary child, without that psychotic shade which always painted earlier her laughter.Apparently, she felt a great relief of that some deeply hidden emotion, at last, comes to light.It strongly excited me and touched.Later quite long time Pamela calmed down, continuing we were alone tenderly and strong to hold me.We together played on a zither and drums.Pamela firmly responded to my offer to invite to the room of her father: No.

In public

They are the strongest, or owing to that are allocated with bigger energy, or on to that was lucky them with surrounding conditions more, whereas those who is in the following circle, have less energy, or they faced big obstacles.In public life the first are considered as owners go strong character, the others weaker.The first feel in themselves a natural attraction to the center, to a sover to shenstvo.The second tend to slide off to the external to ring, to асоциальное™ and an extra sociality.

Special rituality

And as an excess makeweight or a gift, probably, life presented to mankind a holiday table or its top a feast where the improvised staging created by participating guests turns dishes in characters of action.Special rituality of acceptance of food, the due handling of viands of the laid table represents not only cause and effect of many vital artful designs, but also signals, is joyful or disturbing, about some manifestations of life of the child.RECIPES OF PREPARATION FOR PREPARATION Fuss of mother in kitchen in adult years is remembered as religious rite.

Everything

These events were not caused any educational metody in the standard sense of it words.On the contrary, these events, as they were developed, became our conductor and teach whether us to treat children.Everything began with our attempts to create the appropriate living conditions, in which development children would not meet obstacles, and to give them the chance independently to choose various means for the figure to Nosta from among that we provided to them.Would follow to note that made us was opening in the nursery psychology.

Such serious

This wrong §ТМОШение adopted also schools.In the world of physiology it also, Kyk of the powerful prince to make the shepherd's servant.The prince the muscular system is used only in order that spo snpp to iovat vegetative life.Such serious mistake cannot but lead to the harmful to consequences its result is division mezhd world of the movement and world of thought.As at the child e < not only reason, but also a body, we understand that in it forging training it is necessary to include games not props brech with anything from this, than the nature presented it.

And it is a cheerful

And it is a cheerful bird a titmouse we wave hands and we twirl by the head, Which often steals wheat we pinch from time to time air fingers, Which is stored in a dark closet palms we close eyes In the house which was built by Jack hands we outline house contours.Here a cat we stretch, Which frightens and catches a titmouse we jump and we do the hvatatelny movements, Which often steals wheat we pinch from time to time air fingers, Which is stored in a dark closet palms we close eyes In the house which was built by Jack hands we outline house contours.

The speech

However, some grammatical mistakes, but now them much less, than earlier still remain.The speech of the kid becomes more expressive.The child not only precisely distinguishes intonation which to him handle, but also itself is capable to give with its help various emotions, can speak louder more silently, do pauses.The dictionary of the kid by five years may contain to words!Now at its lexicon there are all parts of speech, there are also generalizing concepts, for example clothes, furniture, jewelry and others.

Being in harmony

Only is able internal, a peace of mind it is possible to impart the skills and knowledge, and to transfer so that the child not only listened, but also heard, and understood.Being in harmony and well understanding what exactly you want to tell, you will be able to avoid extremes: will excessively not sponsor or rigidly to control the child, will not begin to hope and on perhaps.You will be able give completely and in due time to it skills which own.Only knowing and following safety rules, it is possible to orient and help correctly the child on own experience to be convinced of their need.

Perhaps, rules

It gets the most part of di tactical materials, almost all materials, but disorder from it does not decrease, and increases even more.Perhaps, rules which she learned are wrong?No.The matter is that there are theories and there are results, to which bring these theories, and an intermediate link between them is absent.This link practical experience of a prepodav tel.At this stage are necessary to the beginner who does not have experience on power and council.Approximately the same happens to the young the doctor or with any who seized certain ideas and the principles, and then finds himself alone with the live the facts which seem to it much more mysterious, than unknown sizes in the mathematical equation!

He as if spoke: I want

But actually we saw much pain to neck.All identity of the child, and the first sign changed it there was a statement of independence.He as if spoke: I want to do everything itself.Please, do not help me.He became suddenly the person who is looking for selfsufficiency despising any help.Who could wait from it that which reactions and that the adult should be limited role of the observer?The child in his world did not manage to appear proportions and the size as became his owner.

I always

Annie remembered something.And after all the truth, it saw on the picture of witches with green hair.Annie smiled.She felt considerable simplification.I always thought earlier that from my thoughts there will be terrible things she told.Has to be, you felt ill at ease after such thoughts if you considered them such awful the godmother told.Annie nodded.Yes, to me it was very bad.Sometimes, when I displayed the things on a desk precisely in such order in what they have to lie, to me calmed down.

And nevertheless

Also they put it is the same into words: In three years the child already the person.And nevertheless it it is far did not settle yet that strange force which it possesses abilities to scoop information from the environment.Children usually came to our first schools aged three years.Nobody could teach them as they were not are susceptible to training.And nevertheless they showed to us amazing greatness of human soul.At us was rather the house for children, but not the real school.

If you want

To put it briefly, in order that you could make this step, we we advise you to dare to rejoice vivacity and unpredictability of the child even if with what he or she surprise you, first causes only alarm and concern.If you want to receive concrete recommendations as it is possible to increase pleasure and pleasure from communication with the child, try to do the following exercises: Make for yourself the list of ten acts of the child which surprised you or were unexpected.Try to find in each of these now acts such parties which can cause in you feelings of pleasure, pleasures, enthusiasm.

What did we do? ! When

They after all and suffer, mother, in any case; she after all understands that occurred: If you saw what it was cheerful earlier.What did we do?!When habitual life collapses, the settled life is scattered, communications friendly, related, human unstable unstable break up, but not the patient initially mentality of the teenager is especially vulnerable.When similar cataclysms occur on the scale of the whole country, to the child is where to take cover, he has an opportunity to escape.

Sometimes

It was not pleasant to Annie at all.She tried to tell them about all good that happened to her at school, hoping that they will begin it to be proud and will forget about the quarrels.Sometimes she started worrying, thinking that they quarreled and angry at each other because she made something not so.Once, when she did not clean up a toy, having left them on a floor, the father, having come home from work, started shouting at mother, abusing it for a disorder in the house.In reply mother too began to shout at it.

Jumped up and stretched

I played on the bongosa standing on a support, accompanying the phrase It is time to speak: Goodbye!Here Mathew who stood and listened, approached a plate, concerned it, then scrambled on a low little table where in a box small tools lay.Again got down down and shouted.Jumped up and stretched to grab a microphone which I managed to rescue.Mathew was excited, ran up to a window and scrambled on a window sill.I came nearer to it, playing on a glockenspiel.The boy calmed down and quickly looked at me.

That is this

It se the stra did it by usual direct strokes, but it at thought something better and used wavy lines, on hozhy on worms.That is this child waited, so far all will fall asleep, except his translator, and came to her, is sure ny in that it will help.Not the anger and violence, but patience notes this period in zhie children, patience to wait for a right moment.Only when the child cannot express himself or finds vnutrs scientific research institute of an obstacle to implementation of the desire, it is the demon strirut bitterness and irritation fits of anger Also sets the described example as these remains starat sya to imitate in the behavior to children is more senior.

The cat on kitchen

What to do with a cat?And once we decided to put a cat into a diet.The cat a bowl empty looks.He waited for two days, and for the third day it had to go about the own main business.The cat on kitchen brought five mice.But is them did not become, sat down again about the pan.We fed the hunter.Than the lazy cat was engaged?How mice in such conditions began to behave?What did owners of a cat make?When the cat decided to work?What did the cat make?

There you will

Most likely, he besides waits for attention, waits that parents right there surrounded it with vigilant care.It is possible to suggest the kid to shout and potopat feet there, at a window.There you will have also a special corner for driving on a floor.By the way, here that you can tell the kid: And when you will stop crying out, approach me and tell that already finished, then it will be possible to suggest you to make something more interesting, than a fulling on a floor and stamping feet.

And all together

Guests too were surprised that Andryusha does not hesitate of them any more.Also were delighted.And all together went to drink tea with crumbs from a pie.Oh, no, not with crumbs, and with a pie!To mice in a mink carried Andryush's crumbs!And the little little mouse bragged of everything: This is Andryusha, my friend.It very courageous!It does not bokitsya neither a cat, nor a thunder, the vacuum cleaner.He even is not afraid to greet guests!Does not want to go to kindergarten One fairy tale As Olya Fell in Love with a Garden is presented in this section.

It compares

The child weighs separate plates on scales and compares their weight.Thus he puts them on different bowls of scales; the child weighs plates by means of weights.It compares the weight of separate plates.If can, it writes down their weight; the child puts on scales at the same time some plates; the child tries to counterbalance a certain number of plates of one series plates of other series.Materials for distinction of noise and sounds The rustling boxes Material.It consists of two boxes on boxes in everyone.

Fie you! Annie

She could not imagine how here to help.Give at first simply we will think mother told.You say that Mary stuck to you with any silly words.How you think that she achieved?Annie reflected for a moment.I think, she wanted me to tease and to enrage.It is similar to the truth mother told.And you made just what she achieved.Fie you!Annie was annoyed.And it could not come to my mind.It shook the head: It is not pleasant to me at all; I am not going to rage at all only because it wants Mary.

All children

As Kolya ceased to peach Irina Turina Once upon a time there was on light the boy Kolya.Very much this boy liked to peach.In kindergarten he and was called: Kolya informer.Once in the warm spring afternoon the group on the platform walked Colin.All children played, and Kolya constantly bekgat to the teacher, Anna Nikolaevna, and complained.Anna Nikolaevna!Kolya shouted, running up to it.

That causes

But analogies let's think that occurs on concert.On faces of listeners there is a delight, the heads and hands start moving in unison.That causes it, if not reaction of mentality to music?Something similar has to about to proceed in unconscious reason of the child.Voices render MT it such deep action that our reaction to music anything in comparison with it.We almost see vibrating /ИПЖСНИЯ its language, fluctuation of tiny vocal chords and cheeks.Everything starts moving, trying in a silent podgo to tovka to reproduce the sounds which caused such confusion in it unconscious reason.

I have to devote

They do not see in me the person.For Jean it were sense of guilt and fear: Has to be, I am the bad person.I have to devote all the life to children.And instead I work in to school or I earn additionally somewhere else.Thereby I deprive children therefore they also behave not as it is necessary.Long time we were ashamed of all these experiences and suffered one by one.Is much later the understanding came: all this only wrong stereotypes of thinking, though enslaved, on our belief, many parents, but nevertheless quite giving in to alteration.

But it means

with and I, unfortunately, was always belittled.If it and Was present at school, only under a sign uprazh III niya, physical culture or games.But it means not about rii.p attention to close connection of the movement from a razviv we yushchitsya by reason.Let's try to consider nervous system of the person in Hi

What do you spin, well

so curiosity right there moved desire to burst in a tirade about the rights and duties of normal school students.And what appeared?It appeared that on awfully difficult subject, mothers!one girlfriend, the girl silent and timid answered.What do you spin, well you spin?the teacher killed it.The girl finally mixed up.the teacher called it.mmmmm.to put it mildly, stupid.Also added some more epithets those which adults when fly into a rage are able to add.

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  • It simple
  • Apparently, she felt
  • Everything
  • In , at the age of fifty
  • I have to devote
  • It is convenient
  • I always
  • Jumped up and stretched
  • But it means
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    Last news
  • B quality the technical assistance expert of the UN year in Thailand worked.In , at the age of fifty five years, he received the second doctor's degree, this time on psychology, and since then works as the psychotherapist, specializing on problems of families and married couples.TO THE READER Passed four years from the moment of issue of the first edition of the book Roberta and Gene Bayardov in Russian.For these years a lot of things changed in our life.One problems passed in it into nothingness, others, new problems appeared.
  • One of Hotelochek grew very quickly, after all her lyubikmy boy Igor, unlike other children, very often her fed and in large quantities once a day sent it on a vozkdukha the volitions.Of course, the eaten volitions quickly zakbyvatsya by Igor, but it proceeded not for long.In one of days it met the Hotelkaya.And there was it in toy store where Igor saw very expensive car treasurehunter.That in it was only not: it shone with headlights, the drill could drill the earth and even it had a laser beam that, for fun prozhikgy earth, to make the way to treasures.
  • Possibly, you will be able, eliminating from the speech these provocative incentives to reduce number of the obzyvaniye cases disturbing you and abuse.Wonder: If I wanted that the child swore or called me, what I should have done?Your answer to this question can to prompt as actually you achieve all this.Gloomy or hostile installation in communication.At Bernice gloomy installation.It always looks gloomy and confoundedly.At Timothy hostile installation.
  • Today called from school and told that you were not there ten days.I noticed that you go without a helmet by the motorcycle of the friend.I was told from police that you were detained in a public place for that, that you were drunk.Tell the child that you feel concerning this situation, having used thus the Yastatement.I am concerned, hearing it.I am afflicted with it.I worry when I hear it.I am surprised.Point to those consequences which you see.
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